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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24143383">Lovefool</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/gothbyleth/pseuds/gothbyleth'>gothbyleth</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>First Love, Hugs, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Pining, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), no beta we die like Glenn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 18:28:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,163</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24143383</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/gothbyleth/pseuds/gothbyleth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Sylvain swallowed thickly. He still didn’t know how to navigate the emotions that welled up whenever he saw Byleth. </p>
</blockquote>Wandering the monastery an early morning, Sylvain thinks about the war, the future, and the man his heart has yearned for so long.
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sylvain Jose Gautier/My Unit | Byleth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>77</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Lovefool</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Finally posting something! I can never get enough of Sylvain and male Byleth, so finally getting this idea down makes me happy!!!</p><p>It's been really hard for me to write at all since my eyes are getting much worse very quickly (bad glasses + lazy eye + unable to keep eyes closed etc) so while it's not dangerous by any means really it significantly affects my ability to look at any screens for longer than a short while. Praying to get it somewhat fixed soonish! This prevents me from beta reading it also so I hope it's okay despite that!</p><p>I can be found at twitter as usual to talk about rarepairs, now with new username! @ gothbyleth</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sylvain was not a morning person. He had never been, but with the war nearing its end he found himself restless quite often, and as soon as he woke up at sunrise every morning he got up to dress himself before venturing out. Today was no different, and after putting on his informal wear of a simple loose shirt, slacks and boots he ventured outside his room to explore.</p><p>That Garreg Mach had yet to wake up and burst with life was a bonus that Sylvain appreciated. As much as he sought out other people and their company, the occasional times he could be alone invigorated him somewhat. For the first time in 5 years, and perhaps even his whole life, he’s allowed himself to ponder on everything that’s happened. It was frightening was much as it was liberating. </p><p>Sylvain sighed contently when he felt the gentle morning breeze against his face. The air was chilly, but comfortably so, and his eyes couldn’t help but be drawn to the sky, pink and purple, not quite unlike Ignatz’s paintings. </p><p>“Wonder how many more of these we’ll get to witness.” he thought to himself. He wished he could be as optimistic as Ashe regarding Fódlan’s future.</p><p>There was a lot to see at the rebuilt monastery, but as always Sylvain didn’t venture too far from his usual route. His legs carried him across the bridge, through the entrance and reception halls and to the pond. He’d often stop there before venturing further, just taking in the view.</p><p>He didn’t expect to find anyone there, and when he noticed who it was his heart swam up to his throat.</p><p>Byleth had yet to notice him, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. Sylvain took the opportunity to admire the man from where he stood, unable to look away. Mint hair blowed gently in the wind, light of the early dawn nearly giving it a faint glow, and with his armor shed Byleth looked surprisingly small and vulnerable.</p><p>Sylvain swallowed thickly. He still didn’t know how to navigate the emotions that welled up whenever he saw Byleth.</p><p>After his disappearance 5 years ago, Sylvain had immediately accepted that there was no one for him left. It had taken him some time to actually admit to himself that his heart felt funny around his professor, but he did not allow himself to yearn for something between them. Sylvain Jose Gautier was not meant to love anyone, and he could never make them happy. There was no point dreaming about an unreal, fairytale future with a man who would never look his way. Of course no one were immune to the volatile matters of the heart, not even him.</p><p>Losing Byleth was the nail in the coffin for Sylvain, and even as he fought with everyone else in the war he felt empty. Even with his bed warmed by strangers he desperately sought affections from, it just wasn’t enough. </p><p>When he thought he had finally buried those old feelings, Byleth returned and Sylvain was certain he was suffocating. While his lungs breathed clearly, the emotions he had finally buried deep within the corners of his dusty heart all but returned in a tidal wave. He knew in that moment that there was no way back.</p><p>Everyone fell back into routine after that, all of the Lions over the moon that their beloved professor was alive and okay. Byleth too were overjoyed, and that his smiles became brighter and more frequent did not escape anyone's notice.</p><p>It blinded Sylvain, even more so when said smiles were directed towards him specifically. Still, he took great care cherishing it.</p><p>They’d spent more and more time together since Byleth’s return. It wasn’t planned initially, but they spoke often and had tea just the two of them regularly. Their routine brought much comfort to Sylvain among all the chaos.</p><p>Every time they spoke over tea, Sylvain realized how much Byleth wouldn’t share with others. While not a surprise, Byleth always taking on more work than he should, Sylvain wished his former professor would share his burdens with others. He wanted to help him, but Byleth was always selfless at his own expense that way. It would have been infuriating hadn’t Sylvain understood the sentiment so intimately himself.</p><p>Brighter smiles also brought other expressions, some of them more pained and somber than Sylvain had ever seen him wear. When Byleth finally noticed him and looked back, Sylvain noted that he wore such a frown right now.</p><p>“Good morning, handsome! Didn’t expect to find you here.” he said as he approached Byleth. The other man’s lips curved up a bit at that, and Sylvain smiled as well as he stood next to him.</p><p>“Good morning Sylvain.” he replied, the small smile still on his lips. “I didn’t know you were an early riser.”</p><p>“I’m not actually.” Sylvain laughed. “Just a lot to think about I suppose, a lot to prepare for... and mornings like these are rather calming when things feel overwhelming.” he added, a more genuine grin forming on his lips as he looked down at Byleth.</p><p>Byleth hummed. “Indeed…” he said quietly as he looked out over the pond again, a small sigh escaping his lips. Sylvain noticed how Byleth fidgeted with his sleeves nervously, and when the wind blew some of his hair near his eyes he reached out to push it away gently. He only realized what he had done once he met Byleth’s eyes, looking up at him in some surprise. Clearing his throat, Sylvain looked out and ignored how warm his face felt suddenly.</p><p>“You don’t have to tell me what weighs on your mind if you don’t want to, but don’t feel like you have to deal with it on your own either.” Sylvain said, looking back at Byleth. He needed him to know that he meant it. “ I’m here for you, we’re all here for you. There is no shame in confiding in others.” he added, a brief wink following his words. </p><p>He was very much aware of his own hypocrisy, but that didn’t matter right now.</p><p>Byleth seemed to ponder on his words, and after a moment his shoulders fell, having been somewhat tense until that point. After a few moments of silence, Byleth spoke.</p><p>“I’ve just been thinking about how much I’ve missed… it’s been a while since I woke up, but I can’t seem to get used to it.” he admitted carefully, as if his words were somehow shameful. Sylvain’s eyes remained at Byleth as he continued.</p><p>“Every day I learn of things that happened during my time asleep, both big and small things. It’s a strange feeling to see everyone you love all grown up and different when it feels like you’ve only dozed off briefly...” </p><p>The former professor sighed and increased his fidgeting. Sylvain could feel the nervousness radiating from him and reached out to touch his wrist softly, his thumb moving in small circles until the tension lifted somewhat, Byleth noticeably relaxing under the touch.</p><p>“I was worried about sleeping again at first... I wondered what would happen if another 5 years passed before I woke up. While that hasn’t happened yet, I’m still wary. I already failed you all once, and I fear doing so again.”</p><p>Sylvain nearly stopped in his tracks at that, his expression growing near bewildered. He didn’t respond for a moment, instead taking great care to choose his words.</p><p>“You returned. That’s more than any of us ever dared to hope.”</p><p>“Eh?”</p><p>Sylvain’s squeezed his grip around Byleth’s wrist gently. He wasn’t sure if he was being too forward or not, but he couldn’t hold back now.</p><p>“As much as we wanted to believe you were out there somewhere, we had to focus on the war. His highness, Felix, Ashe, Annette... we all grieved, but there was no other way than to keep going, keep fighting. Of course, it felt hopeless at times with the loss of you, his highness and Dedue.” he laughed, although without humour. Sylvain took a brief moment to collect himself somewhat before turning his gaze back to Byleth, genuine smile on his lips.</p><p>“All you three are returned, and things are actually starting to look hopeful despite everything. Everyone here feel a vigor we haven’t in years. So don’t you dare think you’ve failed us when it’s quite the opposite.”</p><p>Byleth was staring at Sylvain with big eyes, expression unreadable. Sylvain tried not to squirm under it, already self conscious over throwing his feelings out so openly. He meant every word, but being genuine was terrifying in that regard for him. Just as he opened his mouth to apologize for his rambling, he felt the thud of Byleth’s body against him. He looked down with brief confusion before Byleth’s arms wrapped around him in a careful, almost bashful hug.</p><p>“Thank you, Sylvain.” he mumbled quietly against his chest. </p><p>Sylvain, almost afraid that Byleth would feel his rapid heartbeat, returned the hug carefully. When he realized Byleth wasn’t about to withdraw, he squeezed him gently as he held him with more confidence. </p><p>“Of course.” he hummed as his hand placed on Byleth’s head. When his fingers tread through the other’s hair, he couldn’t help but note how soft it was.</p><p>They both lost themselves in the moment until people began to roam nearby. The monastery was waking up, and Sylvain reluctantly let go of Byleth slowly. However, they still held onto each others arms, hands nearly touching. Sylvain couldn’t help but nearly grab it, though he resisted the urge.</p><p>“We should head to the dining hall. Long day ahead of us, no time for slacking off!” Sylvain joked, winking as Byleth’s smile widened. While he still looked a bit weary, there was more mirth in his smile again.</p><p>“Go ahead without me, I need to take care of something. I will see you later though, you know where to find me if you need anything.”</p><p>“You got it! I’ll catch you later!”</p><p>Sylvain kept his calm as he walked away, but nearly lost it as he entered the dining hall. His heart beat furiously and all he could do to calm down was breathe slowly. Easier said than done, he realized.</p><p>He almost fell over as something pushed his back roughly. He hadn’t even noticed their presence.</p><p>“Are you gonna eat or keep blocking the doorway.” Felix snarled, not really a question, though with less bite than usual. Sylvain had never been so happy to see his friend before.</p><p>They ate in relative silence, though Sylvain could tell something was bothering Felix. He couldn’t ask what could have happened however before he noticed Byleth entering, and without really meaning to his gaze locked to him. </p><p>This only served to provoke Felix it seems, and he punted his foot against Sylvain underneath the table in annoyance.</p><p>“Hey!” Sylvain yelped in surprise.</p><p>“Are you ever going to confess to him or are you gonna bore holes into him with your staring?” Felix snapped. He had worked hard to coerce Sylvain to open up about his feelings for some time, and ever since then he had listened to all his woes. It never bothered him, he was happy that Sylvain finally talked, but his inaction nearly drove Felix mad.</p><p>Opening his mouth to speak, Sylvain closed it quickly again. It didn’t take long for him to respond though.</p><p>“I want to make sure he knows I’m serious... “</p><p>Felix scoffed. “All he does is praise and speak highly of you. I’m not sure you need to prove anything at this point.”</p><p>“No! I have to do this right, I…” Sylvain hesitated, nearly embarrassed. His voice got softer and could barely be heard over the increasing chatter in the hall. “... I could never forgive myself if I fucked up the only thing I’ve ever wanted.”</p><p>Felix was quiet at first, simply observing his friend. Still, he couldn’t hold back a small grin at the sight. Without warning he stood up and gathered his dishes, lifting them up and giving Sylvain a final look.</p><p>“Alright then, don’t come crying to me later when the pining becomes too much to bear.” he said before turning to leave, not giving Sylvain a chance to respond. Sylvain could only swallow whatever fumbled retort he had. He could never win over Felix, especially not when he was right.</p><p> </p><p>As Sylvain looked across the hall after losing sight of Felix, he saw Byleth eating and talking to Seteth. He couldn’t help but smile to himself as the man laughed, relief washing over him over Byleth’s obviously improved mood. </p><p>He didn’t know how he would tell Byleth, nor did he know when. They had to focus on the war first, only when the future was secured would he allow himself to open up.</p><p>Because despite the uncertainty of everything and what would happen, he found himself hopeful. </p><p>Hopeful for a future with someone he care for.</p>
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